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GAY PEOPLE'S CHRONICLE

September 18, 1992

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Safer sex tips for lesbians

Many lesbians are aware of AIDS yet not all of us believe it can affect us or infect us. It's what we do, not who we are that puts us at risk.

AIDS is caused by a virus called Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV). The HIV virus can be spread by blood, vaginal fluid, urine, feces, breast milk and semen from HIV-infected people through sex and other activities. Safer sex and behavior means never letting these fluids get into your body through your mouth, vagina, anus or rectum; or cuts, sores or openings in your skin.

Statistically, lesbians are considered the lowest risk group for contracting any sexually transmitted disease. This does not mean lesbians are immune. Woman to woman transmission of every sexually transmitted disease has been documented, including the HIV virus. No one knows how many women have gotten HIV from sex with other women because researchers don't usually ask women about lesbian sex. We do know that sex between women CAN spread the AIDS virus. And we've got to protect ourselves through safer sex.

Safer sex (because there's no such thing as safe sex) means being smart and staying healthy. It means showing love, concern, and respect for your partner and yourself. Safer sex means enjoying sex to the fullest without transmitting, or acquiring transmitted infections.

Safer sex does not mean eliminating sexual passion and intimacy from your life. Safer sex means reducing the chance of acquiring HIV infection.

Safer sex means realizing that you and your partner are not in bed alone. When you have sex with your partner, you are also having sex with every partner she has had sex with, along with her partner's partners, etc. And she with yours.

It is especially important to practice safer sex if you're HIV positive. In addition to protecting your partner against infection, safer sex helps safeguard your health against other sexually transmitted illnesses that may weaken your immune system. What is safe? What is risky?

Sexual activities that include no direct contact with your partner's blood or secretions are safe. Activities that do involve direct contact with blood or secretions are risky. Precautions that reduce the chance of direct contact with these fluids will make sex safer.

Talking. Talking can make every other sexual activity safer. Talking helps you get to know your partner better, contributes to sexual pleasure, and provides an opportunity to negotiate safer sexual practices.

Fantasy. The brain creates images and finds words to arouse, delight, and satisfy. Imagination and creativity add richness to sexual experience.

Touching. Touching, caressing, and massage provide warm affectionate, and safe intimacy. The imaginative use of loving fingers and hands can relax, soothe, or excite.

Masturbation. It is safe for vaginal fluids to contact unbroken skin (without obvious open cuts or sores) through self pleasuring or mutual masturbation.

Kissing. There is no evidence that kissing transmits HIV, though deep kissing may transmit other sexually transmittable diseases. Deep kissing is safe unless either of you has a cut or sore in your mouth, or bleeding gums. (Use caution after eating and after brushing or flossing your teeth, all of which may cause your gums to bleed.) Oral Sex. The risk of acquiring HIV by performing oral sex (cunnilingus) seems very low but the possibility still exists. Using a latex barrier may reduce the risk further. Contact with menstrual blood is very risky. If she is infected, her mentrual blood (like other blood) may have a lot of the virus in it.

Fingers. Putting your fingers inside her can be risky. To be safe, wear latex gloves, as lots of us routinely have cuts on our hands that we are unaware of, thus increasing our risks. (Lemon juice smeared over

your hands helps you find even the smallest of cuts!). Never reuse gloves.

Lubricants. Always use water based lubricants, like KY jelly. Some lubricants contain nonoxynol-9, which provides additional protection against HIV. Oil-based lubricants may cause the latex in dental dams to weaken and tear, so avoid any oil or petrolium-based lubricant, lotion, or cream (such as Vaseline, hand and body moisturizers, cooking oils, or shortening). As with latex gloves, don't reuse barriers, dental dams, or condoms used for do-ityourself barriers.

Sex Toys Dildoes or vibrators are safe by themselves, but it is risky to share them. If you share, put a fresh condom on them before use. Clean them thoroughly after use with bleach and don't reuse the bleach.

S&M Activities. S & M and rough sex are safe if there is no blood involved. If you are piercing each other, never share needles. Use different razors if you shave each other or don't share razors at all.

Drugs And Alcohol. Alcohol and other recreational drugs do not cause HIV infection or other sexually transmitted diseases with the exception of IV needle drug use. However, alcohol and drugs are often major factors when people have unsafe sex. Safer sex is smart, healthy, SOBER sex. Safer sex takes some planning, thinking, and negotiating. Alcohol and drugs can impair your judgement, short circuit your thinking, and limit your ability to communicate effectively. Alcohol and drugs may also make you clumsy and careless in using barriers and lubricants.

Alcohol and some recreational drugs (including cocaine, marijuana, and "designer drugs") may damage the immune system itself, making you more susceptible to infectious diseases in general.

It's important to keep alcohol and drugs out of sexual experiences. Learning skills to do this is a key part of preparing for safer sex. If alcohol or drugs frequently seem to be a part of your sexual life, seek counseling so you can find ways to change this pattern. And if alcohol or drugs have become problems for you, counseling can direct

you to help.

If you shoot drugs do not share paraphernalia. Never share needles; never use rebagged needles; never share works or cookers. All of these activities will expose you to HIV. It is even high-risk to share needles for ear and skin piercing, or for tattooing. If you must share, clean works with bleach and do not reuse or inject bleach.

Artificial Insemination/Alternative Fertilization. All women who want to use artificial insemination to become pregnant should have the donor--whether known or unknown--screened for HIV antibodies. Safer donor recommendations include testing the donor for HIV infection at the time of donation, freezing donor semen for at least six months, and retesting the donor for HIV before donor semen is used.

HIV Testing. If you think you might be at risk, it's a good idea to take the HIV antibody test. If you find out you are positive, there are resources that can help you stay healthy. To be sure of your result, wait 3-6 months after your last risk before taking the test. (Most infected people will test positive after three months but a few people may take longer.)

Taking the antibody test is the only way to know if you have HIV. Free, anonymous testing is available.

Sources:

Queer Nation, New Orleans, "Suzie Cruisee's Safer sex fashion tips for the 90's"

San Francisco AIDS Foundation brochure "AIDS and Lesbians"

Gay Men's Health Crisis (GMHC) brochure "Women loving Women" endorsed by Women and AIDS Resource Network, Inc. (WARN)

See Page 8 for additional resources.